Mark 10: 28-30
Luke 18: 28-30
Divine
Inspiration
This morning as I journaled, I felt
deep feelings of love and connection for the people in my yoga teacher training
course. We had just spent 20 hours
together over the last few days. And,
the connection between us had grown and deepened. But, on the heels of that good feeling of
connection came a feeling of dread and fear – what will happen if I have to
leave them and move yet again?
Maybe you know, maybe you don’t, that
I resigned from my “day job” at the end of 2017. It was a job for which I had relocated from
Texas to North Carolina. It was a job
that was going to enable me to live closer to both sets of parents and
therefore deepen my connection with them, which I felt called by the Lord to do. And, it was a job that I thought was my dream
job – fancy title and all. But, the dream
became a nightmare that I could no longer tolerate. And, so, for the first time in my life, I
resigned without having another job to go to.
In order to rebuild my health,
deepen my yoga practice and keep my mind fresh while job searching, I enrolled
in yoga teacher training. What I didn’t
count on was building the deep, soulful connections with the other teacher
trainees and leaders. Why didn’t I, especially when
you consider that the very word “yoga” means to yoke, to connect? I don’t know.
Maybe I have been too focused on myself and getting “back to where I
was.” Regardless, connected we have
become, and it has enriched my life – my soul – in ways I desperately needed.
Yet, as I write this, there is a
potential new job on the horizon that would require yet another move. And, the happiness I felt at reflecting on
the soul connections that have formed quickly turned to sadness at possibly
leaving. And, that led me to reflect on
ALL of the connections in my life, not just my fellow trainees and teachers.
From the earliest I can remember, I
have always connected deeply with people.
I can remember crying on the last day of school each year because I had
already begun to miss my teacher. I
would beg her to promise me to come to dinner at my house. (As a child, dinner at my house, especially
Italian food cooked by my mom, was the biggest and best thing I could offer
anyone, and still is, even today.) And,
that reminded me of the teachers that I really connected with at a soulful level,
one of whom I’m still connected with today, thanks to social media.
That led me to think about the
connections I’ve made living in all the different places I’ve lived –
Pennsylvania, Virginia, Colorado, South Carolina and Texas. There are so many wonderful souls with whom I
haven’t spoken in years but could call today and would still have that
deep connection. Then, there are the
souls who I left behind in Texas that I do stay close to, even more so with
FaceTime and a bottle of wine!
Every time I’ve moved, whether from
one grade to another or one state to another, it has absolutely killed me to leave. I mean, it deeply grieves me. I get so connected that it’s as though I am
being rent – ripped violently and torn – from the very fabric of my life and
those I’ve grown to love.
But, what about the teachings we read
in the gospel and yoga teachings (vairagya and aparigraha) about not being attached to anyone or anything? In the gospel readings, Jesus has just
finished telling a man that he must give up everything – EVERYTHING – his house,
family, all that he owns – if he wants to follow Christ and deepen his
faith. And, Peter says, “Look, we have left
our homes to follow you.” (And, they
didn’t have social media to stay connected in those days!) But, Jesus says, “Truly I tell you, there is
no one who has left house or wife or brothers or parents or children (or friends,
my add), for the sake of the kingdom of God, who will not get back very much
more in this age, and in the age to come eternal life.” (Luke 18:
28-30 and Mark 10: 28-30) As I thought about this, and all the soul
connections I have made with so many people in so many places and times of my
life, I realized that soul connections do not depend on a physical location or
time. They just are. And not only that, they multiply!
That was when I heard the voice of God
telling me, “Don’t worry about another move.
Don’t assume that happiness and connection are impossible without the
place. Don’t assume that you must live
near a person to experience the deep soulful connection with him or her. Soul connection occurs regardless of physical
place, and really even time.” And that,
I get.
Amen.
August 6, 2018
